Oh Sweet Jemima (yes that is one of my favorite sayings)! This blog post is going to be somewhat different than what I normally do, but I feel like switching it up needs to happen sometimes. For those of you that have been around the blog for a while know hat I normally like to write on a specific personal development, mindset, or self help topic that I think will be helpful for you, but today I want to take a few moments and actually tell you story about myself. My hope is that this story will inspire you to handle the shit storms or shit sandwiches, if you will, that life throws at us with grace, dignity, and a fierce passion for your own growth.
So let me backtrack a little. For those of you that don’t know much of my story I have been dealing with chronic illness for 12 years, and suffice it to say it has definitely had it’s ups and downs, and taken it’s toll on me. I have had to do a great deal of healing to try and forgive my body for its failures, the things it will never be able to do, and mourn the loss of the person that I thought I was going to become. But overall I think I have done a pretty good job of keeping my head above ward, so to speak, and staying strong. I pride myself on my strength and ability to keep going despite the barrage of shit storms. I don’t say that to sound cocky, but rather as a way to let you know that it has taken a lot of work, but that I am stronger than I have ever been.
Having said that last week I received some really disturbing and outright depressing medical news. Suffice it to say I am getting sicker, and my conditions have taken a turn for the worse in a way that my current doctors no longer know how to handle. Now again I don’t say this for you to feel sorry for me, or to worry about me, but rather to paint the picture. As a result of the news I have been left in a somewhat emotional hurricane, if you will. I have been dealing with emotions and feelings that I don’t particularly like to sit in, but can’t seem to break free from. I know that I will because I unfortunately am not a stranger yo unpleasant medical news, but this time it’s hitting me harder than usual.
But the whole point of me telling you this story is to remind you of your own strength. You are far more capable, stronger, and more of a bad ass than you could possible imagine. I know that life throws shit at us, and it can be very difficult to see a way out. Believe me I get it, more than most. But you will come out the other side because nothing can stay bad forever. There will always be glimpses of light int he darkness, and brief moments of breeze on the hottest of days because nothing is constant, not even our suffering. I just urge you to remind yourself everyday of your strength because you are so much stronger than the worst things this life will throw at you.
Until next time my loves, remember you need to push through everyday because the more you push the closer you are to the day that you look up and see the sun shining down on you.